Each year on September 18th, it is tradition that I capture my thoughts and feelings about what this day means to me. In 2009, it had the potential of being the worst day of my life; I could’ve lost my mental or physical faculties, my ability to speak, or the unthinkable, my relatively short life altogether. Without fear or hesitation, I willingly went under anesthesia to have my skull sawed open to have the tumor and bleeding AVM removed which were causing me to suffer in excruciating pain for days. Brain surgery was my only option.
All of this hit when my world was already like a haphazard construction site after an emotional earthquake. My loving mother and sole-remaining parent who had an enormous presence in my life, died the year before. The messy debris of my shattered heart and soul couldn’t fill the crater-sized hole her loss left. And as I was still grieving and sifting through the rubble to rebuild without her, came this knockout news that I had foreign invaders in my head just 503 days in.
As I recovered at home, everything about life felt and looked different; my skull, skin, perspective, head compression, future, and essentially, my world. I couldn’t write or think or walk straight, or do much beyond nursing a persistent, but less severe headache which took 6 long months. Grateful for any physical abilities and my life as a whole at that point, I remained calm and patient, allowing healing and life to gradually unfold. How I mustered up that patience still bewilders me. I recognized the magnitude of the surgery I endured and began to see my personal human experiences as more precious and meaningful. Consequently, I turned off my internal automatic decision-making process. Certain choices, which were once routine, and maybe not-so-great now became thought-out and deliberate. I developed a strong desire to move towards making healthier options all around. This included relationships, lifestyle habits and food.
It’s been 14 wonderful years of constantly learning, refining good habits through practice and searching for more ways to enhance and improve life (not just mine) along the way. My personal rebuild resulted from; the love and support of my incredible husband, Dan, family and friends, evidence-based nutrition information from doctors, whole, fresh, plant-based ingredients which make up tasty meals, and a daily dose of exercise. Grabbing the calamity that happened on this day as an opportunity to reset my life was a “no-brainer”.
Looking back, I’m overjoyed to have experienced the awful events of this day in 2009, for it has served as a major catalyst for positive change in my life. It has informed my journey of happiness, health and longevity. And I’m going to keep it going.
